Two years: we are practically still in the honeymoon phase – minus the fact that we are definitely not lying on a beach in Hawaii anymore.
Two years is a tiny dot in the scheme of committing our whole lives together. Regardless, it’s 730 days – good and bad – of growing, learning and exploring as one. We packed a lot in, too, with a deployment, cross-country road trip and move. We also popped out a baby, and we’re still grappling with the reality of this beautiful, perfect little being that somehow came from the both of us.
Perhaps that’s why some people say that the first years of marriage are the most volatile. The early years are filled with the most change. We go from individuals to operating as one, and then we throw in life-changing milestones like buying a house or having children.
And while it’s easy to shrug off the intimacies of marriage in exchange for these more pressing matters that consume our time – moving up the ladder at work, budgeting our finances for the future and tackling the beast that is parenthood – I have come to the realization that the busiest, craziest days of our lives are the days that will determine our future. On these days, we should love even harder.
It sounds obvious, but it is easier said than done when you have bills to budget, work deadlines to meet and a crying baby to tend to. The days blur together and the weeks start to pass.
But now is the time to set a precedent for our marriage. Now is the time when habits form. Now is a time that we will never get back. Now is the time to love fiercely.
So no, we are definitely not on that beach in Hawaii anymore. But it is up to us to create our paradise. The same one that we envisioned on May 18, 2014 when we pledged our lives as one. When we acknowledged that things won’t always be easy, but we would support each other tirelessly. When we acknowledged that the romance may fade, but we would never stop seeking spontaneity and opportunities to date one another. When we acknowledged that we would make mistakes, but that we would find patience and forgiveness to fight for this love that we believe in, this love that we take responsibility for and hold delicately in our hands.
Now is the time to stand by these words. So that when we are wrinkly and grey, we won’t be boasting about how much stronger our marriage has become; we will be boasting about how strong it has always been. How, even in the days of diaper changes and long work hours, we still found time to write the next chapter of our love story.
Love does not grow on its own. We must love with intent as much as we live with intent.
So here’s to two years, my love, of building the strongest marriage. Let’s light up our love like we knew it could when we said “I Do.”